Valerie Bertinelli is done apologizing for loving her late ex-husband. The 66-year-old actress used a new Instagram post to confront commenters who accuse her of being “obsessed” with Eddie Van Halen, to whom she was married from 1981 to 2007.
Bertinelli said the criticism used to get to her. “It used to really bother me,” she said, but it doesn’t anymore.
“They never quite say the words, ‘you’re not allowed to love your ex-husband, that’s ridiculous, you can’t love him,'” she said. “They never quite say that, but they berate you and berate you for months, make you think you’re crazy until you finally say, ‘OK, fine, I don’t love him.'”
She said that whenever she posts old photos with Van Halen and their son from what she called “better days,” commenters pile on. “They say that you’re obsessed, say all kinds of f—ed up s— until you take the picture down,” she said.
Bertinelli called the pile-on “soul-breaking,” but said she has reached a point where strangers online don’t get to dictate her feelings. “They can’t tell me how I feel,” she said.
“My heart can hold a lot of love. I have a big piece right here that’s got Ed’s name all over it,” she said. “And, if I ever fall in love again, I’ll make room in my heart for that person, without it touching the love I have for Ed, my son, my daughter-in-law, all the people that I love.”
She closed by stating plainly that she loves Van Halen and “never stopped loving Ed” because her “heart loves a lot.”
The post followed a tribute she shared a day earlier marking the sixth anniversary of Van Halen’s death, captioned: “Photos may fade, like old photos do, but not the memories and never the love.”
Supporters backed her in the comments. One wrote: “Ed is the father of your child. Your child is an extension of Ed in so many ways for that reason alone there is no way to stop loving him.” Another added: “Divorce doesn’t necessarily mean you can’t, don’t or won’t love your ex anymore. I wish people would mind their own business.”
Van Halen died in October 2020 at age 65 following a stroke, after a six-year battle with throat cancer. He and Bertinelli had one child together, son Wolfgang, now 35. Bertinelli later married Tom Vitale, to whom she was wed from 2011 to 2021.
